February 21, 2013
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We took our sons electronic devices
from him last night. The ones that allow him contact with the ‘outside’ world. His cell phone; an old iphone that he uses as an ipod; his shared (with his sister) ipad; an old laptop… he is not to close the door to his bedroom during homework hours. He must ask to use any electronic device. We don’t allow tv or gaming during the school week – except for Hawaii 5-O; big bang theory and elementary…
Loved equally – one kid is a piece of cake – the other, a piece of work (albeit still in process and far from done)… and reflecting on it – has been since they were young.
They say that as toddlers they are training you as parents for the teenage years. I hope this isn’t true – but so far it seems to be holding…
My wife took our son to her glass bead studio the other night and had him photograph her while she was making beads.
The teacher asked that he take other students as well
the images are pretty spectacular
especially for an eleven-year old kid.
He’s got a pretty sharp eye for composition and content.
What this doesn’t translate to – is common sense. Where that lies – no idea. He’s been fabricating stuff lately – and it’s something we will not tolerate. Do you have homework? Yes – is it done/ yes… do we need to check it?/ no – reality – no it wasn’t done, his teachers have taken notice and now yes – we will have to check it.
His cell phone – calls at 12:40 AM – he’s 11!!! Wtf?!? Texts with girls, with boys – stupid trite stuff… some twitter-like picture thing account with 90 some cute girl followers – wtf?!? He must have been spending hours on this stuff… No mas…
He was just accepted (per recommendations by his school; and an interview process) to a prestigious math & science program that is sponsored by a prominent hospital in the area – it’s his goal in life (right now) to be a ‘nerd’ from big bang theory… fine, great – those guys didn’t get to be the ‘dorks they are’ via instagram (just popped into my head) and texting about hi-fiving another kid in the face – with a chair…. Ughhhh…
Comments (24)
I had two daughters. They took turns making me crazy, which is a good thing because if they would have ganged up on me and been assholes at the same time, they would have won. Hang in there. Kids are brutal.
@BoulderChristina - you still have those daughters bc… and yes – i’m thinking that i will wrap my head in duct tape for the next several years – as a bumper and to help hold it together… hi bc… howzit? no music – sorry…
Oh! That glass thing looks cool
What a horrid dilemma…true, he can’t accomplish things that really matter if he is texting anyone and everyone all day long. It’s hard not to feel mean for taking things away from a kid, though. Best of luck with it all.
wow. I didn’t have cell phone until I started high school, and the only other thing I had was a computer. sounds like you’re doing the right thing. he’s trying to take advantage of your kindess, and I think it’s best you put your foot down and remind him you’re the parent, not his friend.
Yes there were advantages to being on the shortfall side of the digital divide while raising my children. I don’t like the way we changed once we brought computer into the home. I still hate cell phones… or at least the constant use and abuse of them. Can’t argue with the practical advantages of limited usage. I remember the days when it was a huge dread to get stuck on the road with a broken down car… not so much a problem these days… no more walking miles to find a phone and get help.
remember when we were kids ?? we had sticks and dirt and we loved it !
…I didn’t have a cell phone until I was 19. And then it was an ancient Nokia with only 60 minutes on it because the previous night my car died and I had to walk five miles home in the freezing January rain at midnight.
those are pretty awesome photos. Kids can’t tell sometimes what’s more important – social life or school work. Seems like you’re doing the right thing, parentally speaking. Of course, I have no kids so what do I know…but I was one once. Way back then I had no cell phones but there were other distractions.
@Nushirox2 - thanks – they are glass beads made from heating the rods which are in the background of the images. thanks for stopping in and commenting – much appreciated.
@GreekPhysique - it’s true – the mean thing – but he’s got to learn what priorities in life are about… and if we as parents don’t teach or lead him – no one else will… thanks for commenting and stopping in – much appreciated.
@Love_in_102 - it’s started off (with the phone) as an ability for us to know where he was particularly to meet his school bus in the afternoons… and now that’s all he gets… handed the phone before school – surrenders it upon returning… thanks for stopping by and commenting – appreciate it.
@JstNotherDay - very true – the use and abuse… the testing and emailing especially when driving… but it is also about the parenting – and trying to instill some belief system in your kids… not an easy task in any day or age. thanks so much for dropping in and commenting – appreciate your doing so…
@IcECaT123 - i’ve tried that with them as well – walking six miles one way up hill in the snow to school and ten miles up hill home at night… doesn’t work so well… thanks for dropping in and commenting – appreciate the humor – helps to find that in everything…
@chronic_masticator - it was originally so we could track him down – his school bus is notorious for ‘disappearing’ – but they are helpful for those reasons – the rest – we’re rethinking all of it… and to be honest – he’s got friends with a lot more than he’s got… it’s quite the balancing act. thanks for commenting – appreciate it.
@leaflesstree - hi leafless… hope you’re feeling better! you’re right – it is about the distractions and helping to focus energy and efforts into the right places! thanks for dropping in and commenting!!!!
Kids don’t seem to develop long attention spans, imagination, and ability to communicate vis-a-vis without a lack of electronic devices. He might grumble about it now, but later when he’s able to function in class and pass – because he did his homework and slept a full 8 hours instead of texting and gaming – he’ll appreciate it (begrundingly).
I’m glad I don’t have kids although having cheap labor has its benefits
@godfatherofgreenbay - like snow shoveling? not… one kid still asleep the other a 6 am, soccer practice…
@Lean_to_the_Write - already noticed a kid that’s way more rested and energetic… now is asleep at 9:30 like he should be to get the hours he needs… thanks for stopping in and commenting – much appreciated…
My son is in 6th grade. He got an iPod for Christmas. His 2 older sisters (16 and 20) were never allowed to have any laptop or computer in their bedrooms. Of course my 20 year left for college at 18 so that changed for her the. But I told my husband our 12 year old basically has a computer in his room as a 6th grader with that iPod. It’s a mini sized computer, and he has been spending a lot of his night time in his room on it. So we just implemented a new rule. He can only use his iPod in the living room with us sitting right near him. It is not allowed in his bedroom. That way we can monitor how much time he’s spending on it, and take it away when he’s had enough. It also discourages him from doing anything inappropriate on the Internet … at least while we’re around. Nothing easy about parenting!
@ItsWhatEyeKnow - yeah – that’s – i don’t know if it’s a ‘boy thing’ or not – or a younger child (more likely). our daughter (older) has crazy good grades, is fiercely independent – and has maintained both grades and self identity thus far, at least through her first year and a half of high school – and as long as that trend continues and she recognizes it’s a privilege i can’t really see changing anything with the way she goes about her business… but mr. son… ‘oblivion’ – is our nickname for him… is generally a really good, super sweet caring kid – but can’t think for himself to save anyone – i mean ferris bueller would be dead – he would have killed him off… thanks for dropping in and commenting – appreciate your time and effort to do so…
Oh kids. Give them an inch, and they’ll take a mile. Hang in there, you can do this! Sounds like you’re already making some smart decisions about the circumstances.
@fruit_snacks_galore - thanks – much appreciated!